Lindsay Lohan was once considered to be the new face of Louis Vuitton, but after a shoot for Elle magazine the fashion house won’t even allow her to borrow any of their clothing now. During the photo shoot Lindsay would take any LV items that she could get her hands on. A source tells Page Six:

Louis Vuitton had sent over some samples for her to wear in the shoot. Lindsay, kept shoving the clothes into her bag, and a stylist’s assistant kept getting them out of the bag, only to have Lindsay keep trying to take them. She ended up walking off with a very expensive shirt and some other items – which screwed Louis Vuitton because they were set to go to Vogue, W and Harper’s Bazaar for other shoots. They were furious and kept trying to get their clothes back, but… Lindsay walked out with them and never returned calls.

This is like when people go to buffets with large duffel bags and when no one is looking they pack up the bag with a week worth of food. I’m surprise Lindsay didn’t smack the assistant that was removing all the items she was stealing. For no apparent reason, below is a picture of Mikhail Gorbachev in Louis Vuitton’s newest ad campaign.

Lindsay Lohan’s mother, Dina Lohan, is being sued by Las Vegas by businessman Antonio Almeida for fraud, he claims Dina “failed to return $400,000 he lent her four years ago to kick-start daughter Lindsay’s music career.” According to Page Six:

Almeida’s lawyer, A. Raymond Hamrick, says some of the dough was used to record songs with Gloria Estefan’s husband, Emilio Estefan, who formed Miami Sound Machine. But Lindsay bolted in the middle of the sessions when she got a deal with Casablanca Records, which released her album, “A Little More Personal (Raw).” “My clients were out their money,” Hamrick said. Dina’s lawyer, David Chesnoff told The Post’s Marianne Garvey: “You mean the funds he claimed he lent her?”

Who in their right mind would invest money in Lindsay’s music career, it’s like investing money in Paris Hilton’s singing career and you know how that went. A better use for the money would be wiping your ass and flushing it down the toilet. This Almeida guy deserves to learn his lessons, investing in Lindsay is like investing in Enron.

Britney Spears has been diagnose with bipolar disorder by a psychologist who has never actually seen the singer. Psychologist Dr. Robert Butterworth tells Us magazine:

Her erratic behavior has moved into bipolar disorder. Your energy level and emotions alternate between highs and lows, and that seems to have happened here.

Another psychologist with the ability to diagnose without actually seeing the person he or she is diagnosing thinks “Britney has a mood disorder… [and] going through a delayed adolescence.” I guess I could be a pseudo-psychologist with my own diagnosis, “Britney is cuckoo.” This psychology stuff is a piece of cake.

Andrew Deetz, the photographer that had his ass beat down by Britney Spears’ bodyguard Julio “JC” Camera at the Wynn Hotel in Las Vegas is planning on suing Britney for the beating as well as her threat on killing him. Britney is hardcore these days; while her bodyguard was kicking Deetz’s ass, Britney was throwing a baby bottle at another photographer and yelling out, “I am going to kill you! I am going to fucking kill you!” at Deetz.

This is just crazy! I would be afraid myself if I was threated by her, she has already committed murder on her singing career and her image, until I realize its only Britney.

Barbara Walters has officially announced that Whoopi Goldberg will replace Rosie O’Donnell as the new moderator for The View and will start her new gig after Labor Day. Walters issue the following statement:

She is brilliant, funny and irrepressible, and is an enormously popular and talented star. We are delighted that she is going to join the program as our moderator. This is going to be a great new chapter for ‘The View.

After the departure of Lisa Ling and Star Jones Reynolds its good to see some new color as oppose to the plain vanilla most recently. I can just see it now, Elisabeth Hasselbeck going to start talking about how good George Bush has been to this country and Whoopi breaking out some whoop ass never seen since the whole O’Donnell vs. Hasselbeck episode.

Paris Hilton has been disinherited from her grandfather Barron Hilton’s will. The family patriarch was never pleased with her sex tape and now after her 23 day stay in jail has had enough and taken her $60 million inheritance away. Jerry Oppenheimer a Hilton biographer says:

He was, and is, extremely embarrassed by how the Hilton name has been sullied by Paris. He now doesn’t want to leave unearned wealth to his family.

Looks like Paris has fucked the rest of the family over with her antics. Barron now plans to donate the whole $2.4 billion he is going to get from the sale of the company to charity. This old timer is now “the man” replacing Judge Michael Sauer.

When news broke of Jessica Alba being single after breaking up with Cash Warren over the phone, men around the world rejoiced. Now Gatecrasher is reporting that the reason behind the breakup was because Cash wasn’t ready to get marry and Jessica was.

He wasn’t ready for marriage, and Jessica is. It’s simple as that. It’s kind of cold that the press is saying she was just finished with him, because it isn’t like that. Seeing Eva get married made Jessica wistful. That was the reason Jessica seemed to be in a terrible mood in Paris.

Can you really believe that someone like Cash would turn down a marriage with a babe like Alba? What kind of an idiot would say no to having sex with Jessica for the rest of their life. Saying “No” to Alba is like Nicole Richie saying she’s still hungry after eating two french fries.

Usher’s original plan of marrying his pregnant girlfriend, Tameka Foster, over the weekend was canceled at the last minute. No reason were given for Usher canceling the wedding, but Usher’s publicist Patti Webster released the following statement:

It was announced today that the wedding ceremony for Usher Raymond, IV and Tameka Foster was canceled. No additional information will be given regarding the circumstances of the cancellation, but we hope the privacy of this matter will be respected.

We can only assume why Usher cancel the wedding. He probably heard recently about Tameka’s criminal past or pressure from his family. Maybe someone told him he won’t be able to have sex with other girls anymore for the rest of his life and given how old Tameka is right now Usher let out a loud, “Ohh Shit.”

A pregnant Nicole Richie was sentenced to serve four days in jail after pleading guilty to driving under the influence of drugs in December of last year. Nicole has been given a choice of which city or county jail she would like to serve her time. She will also pay a fine of $2,048, complete an alcohol education course and serve three years probation.

Luckily for Nicole, she didn’t get the same judge Paris Hilton gotten for violating her probation and driving on a suspended license. If Nicole had, she would most likely be sent to a gulag. Maybe this judge was more lenient due to the fact that Nicole is pregnant.

Britney Spears cousin and now former assistant, Alli Sims, has betrayed Britney by giving detail information about her erratic behavior to Kevin Federline. Kevin will be using this new information to get custody of his two boys, Sean and Jayden. A longtime pal of Britney told OK! Magazine:

Alli gave specific instances where Brit couldn’t handle having the kids. Kevin was angry at Britney for putting his kids in jeopardy and immediately phoned his lawyer to investigate the claims further. He couldn’t believe she had gotten so out of control.

I have no idea why Britney is fighting Kevin for custody of her two children when all we see now is her spending so much time with her new Yorkshire Terrier. She’s so close to her new terrier I’m surprise she hasn’t been confused and called the dog Sean or Jayden. I can just imagine her screaming out, “Stop barking Sean, you making mommy crazy.”