All I can say is that I have not been in contact with Britney since early Friday morning.
The reason being, that I have had to attend a family funeral in Santa Barbara. My phone has been off during this time out of respect for my family. I am only now becoming aware of what is being said. I hope to be back home in Los Angeles soon and to be in contact with Miss Spears.

In the video, Britney is asked if she has anything to tell Adnan and she responded in a British accent, “I don’t know who that is. I’ve never met him before.” Maybe Britney’s breaking up with Adnan because he didn’t get her pregnant or maybe it’s Sam Lutfi who wants Britney all to himself and cause the whole restraining order thing.

Should something ever happen to Britney Spears the Associated Press has already written her obituary. Usmagazine.com reported it and AP entertainment editor, Jesse Washington, confirms it and says, “We are not wishing it, but if Britney passed away, it’s easily one of the biggest stories in a long time.” Jesse also added:

I think one would agree that Britney seems at risk right now. Of course, we would never wish any type of misfortune on anybody and hope that we would never have to use it until 50 years from now … but if something were to happen, we would have to be prepared.

It isn’t unusual for a news organization such as AP to have obituaries written for celebrities, except they are usually reserved for aging and dying ones. Does this mean the AP could be causing Britney’s premature demise, with all those paparazzi trying to chase her down to get a picture to sell?

Britney Spears has gone crazy. You would think Britney’s latest craziness was because she was drunk or even on drugs, but her blood test came back negative. This mean Britney is just crazy and needs some major help.

This all stated late Thursday night when Britney refused to hand over her children to Kevin Federline and the police was called in. It’s “a very serious no-no in the world of courts,” when Britney refused to hand over her children to the police. People says:

As for the standoff that ensued, as well as, it has been assumed, arguments in front of the children by the parents, Filan said the courts are also likely to take a very dim view. She also said that this could pave the way for Federline to be in charge of determining all future decisions involving the boys.

What’s wrong with the courts in California, they should have taken Britney’s children away for their own safety and given them to Federline a long time ago. Lets hope the courts do the right thing and take away all custody of the children from Britney. Now let’s prey for this hostage taking, mentally unstable singer.

We should have know this was going to happen eventually, Britney Spears’ lawyer has filed request to withdraw from her ongoing custody battle with ex-husband Kevin Federline.

In the legal papers, attorney Tara Scott from Trope and Trope wrote, “There has been a breakdown in communications between [Britney] and Trope and Trope making further representation of her interests impossible.”

Sources tell TMZ the reason Trope and Trope withdrew is because Britney just didn’t listen to her lawyers’ advice, and her behavior was generally sinking her case.

The lawyer must have realized Britney isn’t trying to win her children back after missing another scheduled deposition, which makes it the fifth time she had better things to do than fighting for her children. Quick, someone smack this girl up side her head to knock some sense into her.

Britney Spears celebrated her 26th birthday Saturday at the Scandinavian Style Mansion where Sharon Stone was hosting a party. Later that night, Britney was presented with a chocolate birthday cake and her friends and a few of the guest sang “Happy Birthday”. Little did she know but in less than an hour her former BFF Paris Hilton was going to make an appearance.

Around 11:30 p.m., Paris Hilton, who was Britney’s brief BFF around this time last year, entered the party to much fanfare. Swarmed by paparazzi and excited guests, the celebutante seemed to get more attention than Britney had received. “Paris drank in the attention,” one witness tells OK!. “Posing for the camera and eating it up.”

Surprisingly there was no cat fight between this to former BFF. With the reunion of Britney and Paris, we will soon witness more beaver shots of Britney like when they first got together. Can’t wait for return of Britney no pantie II.

The Los Angeles court have come to their senses and agree Britney Spears’ is a dangerous driver. The court have rule today that Britney can’t drive with her kids in the car.

Thank Goodness!

Britney Spears has ran over another photographer’s foot. This time it took place outside Four Seasons in Beverly Hills. TMZ says:

The drivin’ popwreck was surrounded by photogs as she made her way into the parking lot. The paps refused to move, despite several warnings and documented footage of how Britney rolls. Moments later, Brit shockingly rolled her new wheels over a guy’s foot.

You can’t blame Britney for running over a foot here and there given all those flashing light in front of your face as you drive. What do you expect when your standing so close to a moving car, their lucky Britney isn’t in the mood to play bumper car with their ass.

The Daily Mail is reporting that Britney Spears had liposuction done on her hips and butt in Vegas while house hunting in Sin City.

The 25-year-old was reportedly house hunting in Las Vegas at the weekend, but sources say she had some nip and tuck while there.

It’s not the first time Britney has turned to cosmetic procedures in a desperate bid to improve her appearance – she had her pout plumped just last month.

Britney just isn’t the type to spend months dieting and exercising to achieve a better looking body, instead she sticks a tube into her body to quickly suck out all those cheeseburgers and frappucinos shes been consuming. Only if McDonald’s Grimace could get some liposuction, if the milkshake loving fuzzy purple thing wasn’t a fictional character.

Britney Spears was caught driving using her cell phone while running a red light with her kids in the backseat last night. Also in the car was her court appointed monitor, who had her head on her lap to avoid the paparazzi or so she doesn’t see her life flash by her as Britney runs a red light. Looks like Britney is helping Kevin Federline strength his case with this new evidence of how unfit Britney is to be a mother.

The Popwreck approached the light slowly on Coldwater Canyon in Los Angeles. You then see Britney raise her cellphone to her face. It is unclear if she’s texting or making a call. She then drives into the intersection as someone outside the car screams, “Red light, red light!” Britney then turns left onto Mulholland Drive, managing to miss oncoming traffic.

It’s amazing how Britney still have a license to drive. You would have guess after running over a couple people, her driving privilege would have been taken away. Maybe they are just waiting for the right moment, like when Britney kills someone with her car.

Update: Added the video of the incident.

Now that Britney only gets limited visit with her kids, and those visits are supervised by a court appointed monitor whose job is to evaluate her parenting skills. Knowing that, you would expect Britney to spend those precious time with her kids, but no, instead she spends that time shopping for chandelier, and leaves her kids with the court appointed monitor. At this rate, the kids are going to think the monitor is their mother and Britney is just some wacky visitor.

How does Britney Spears spend her court-approved time with her kids? By chandelier shopping, y’all! Them things is sparkly! Looky them little ding-dangly rainbows all over there!

TMZ caught the popwreck going to Crystal Palace in the Valley yesterday, leaving her two kids in her car with the court-required monitor while she shopped for lighting. Hmm… part-time babysitter probably isn’t part of the woman’s job.

Why does Britney still have visitation rights? Just take those kids and place them in the jungle where they will be raised by animals and become Tarzan.

While playing Truth or Dare with friends, Britney Spears revealed her secret crush on this month’s Playboy cover girl Kim Kardashian.

I really love Kim’s butt, skin and hair. Kim is a real woman. A real horny beast.

Wow, did Britney just officially announce she’s a bisexual? Yes she did. I know this should be hot, seeing two Hollywood sex machines getting busy, but on the other hand knowing its Spears and Kardashian it just doesn’t feel that special. Who am I kidding, I can’t wait to see Britney rub some fried chicken grease over Kardashian gigantic ass.

More court documents were released concerning Britney Spears and Kevin Federline’s ongoing custody battle. Big shocker, Kevin earned about $500,000 in 2006, but wind-up only grossing $7,436 after business expenses. Wonder what kind of business expense we’re talking about here. Britney makes $737,000 a month and will pay Kevin $15,000 a month in child support until Sean Preston and Jayden James becomes adults. Here is a breakdown of their spending per month:

Britney’s Expenses:
• $102,000 on entertainment, gifts and vacation
• $49,267 on mortgage payments
• $16,000 on clothes
• $4,758 on eating out
• $2,500 on phone bills

Kevin’s Expenses:
• $5,000 on entertainment, gifts and vacation
• $7,500 on rent
• $2,000 on clothes
• $1,500 on eating out
• $750 on phone bills

That’s a lot of talking, who actually spends $2,500 on their phone bill besides a company. Surprisingly, bill from eating out seems to be small compare to her increasing waistline. This must be from all those free food she gets when she goes out. That $16,000 in clothes doesn’t need any explanation, remember her increasing waistline, I knew you would get it.

After some luck Britney was given visitation rights with her boys after agreeing to have the court-appointed parenting coach present while she visited her kids. And, once again Britney has somehow pissed off the coach and now her visitation with her kids is in jeopardy again. On Monday the coach filed a damaging report according to a source:

The paperwork, filed under seal to LA Superior Court, claims that “[Spears, 25] paid her [monitor] no attention or respect at all, as if she were some employee whom she could blow off,” the source says.

“Britney’s often distracted and in her own world when she has the kids [Sean Preston, 2, and Jayden James, 1] and has a hard time focusing,” the insider adds. “She is adamant that she doesn’t have to listen to anybody — that it’s her way or the highway.”

A simple solution to Britney’s focusing problem when she’s around her kids is to dress them in a Starbucks’ cup costume. After seeing the walking Starbucks cups, Britney would utter, “OMG, those are the largest latte y’all, I need to hold them.”